my cock itches at every stare. my imagination runs wild. yea, he wants this big, chocolate cock in his bubble ass. oh and him, yea, he wants/needs my cum down his throat. oh yea, he wants to bury his face between my juicy ass cheeks and tongue me down.
i know what these guys want. i know what they need. somehow i find a way to control myself in public. but behind closed doors, the games begin.
i begin to cruise the internet. sex websites. blogs. craigslist. i want it so bad. my body aches for it. then i try to take it all out on him. sometimes it works. though a lot of times lately, it hasn't.
so i cruise. i find guys. they find me. we chat. exchange pics. sext back and forth. IM filthy messages back and forth. cam2cam.
sometimes i get the courage to meet up. fool around. get mine. they get theirs. but the guilt soon sets in. i love him. but his sex isn't cutting it anymore. i want something more. something hotter. sexier. raunchy.
i wonder if he wants the same thing...
i'll get the courage to ask him soon. to see if he wants something more. not in our relationship, but in the bedroom. i'm sure he does since he did bring it up a year ago. and i'm pretty sure he fools around... i kind of went through his text messages one day.
but until then, i continue to cruise. to find another empty hole to fill. another cock to fill my tight hole. companionship. lust. another guy's scent. musk. natural body odor.
such a fucking turn on.
hopefully soon, i'll be able to share this with him. that's the biggest fantasy of all. tag-teaming hot twinks, jocks and studs.
here's to wishin.